Pregnancy & Infant Loss Support

August 24, 2020 Nathan Lundie

Created by Kim Perez, FNTP and Michelle Brooks

Pregnancy and infant loss of any kind such as miscarriage, termination of pregnancy, stilbirth, or infant loss can be devastating, turning your whole world upside down. So many women suffer in silence due to embarrassment, shame, fear, and grief, let alone the stigmas surrounding these topics.

After going through a loss, it’s common to feel paralyzed by uncertainty and be confused where to get help or what to do next. But we are here for you, and hope to help by providing you resources for getting the information and support you need to process, grieve, and heal through this process.

Mental & Emotional Recovery After Loss

The mental and emotional toll of pregnancy and infant loss is often immense, and can affect women in very different ways. It’s so important to be able to identify and process what’s going on in your head and in your heart so that you can find productive ways to cope and eventually, heal. For many, postpartum depression and/or anxiety are common; however, there is a wide spectrum of mental health challenges you can experience, not just these more common diagnoses.

Getting the mental and emotional support you need through these challenges can come in various forms-- from talking to others who share your experiences (we suggest joining the Street Parking Women's Loss and Infertility Support Group), to journaling, to counseling/therapy and more. Every woman is unique in what works for her, so try to stay open minded and explore different avenues until you find what helps you best. For guidance on finding mental health support, check out our resource: Mental Health Support for Mamas.

Physical Recovery After Loss

Just as important as mental and emotional recovery after loss is physical recovery. Whether your baby was carried to full term or to 4 months or 4 weeks, your body still goes through a postpartum period requiring rest, nourishment, rehabilitation, and patience. When a pregnancy ends in any way, there’s a loss of blood and other fluids, a drop in hormones, organs and tissues that have been stretched and moved that need to return to their usual state, and more, so your body needs attention, care, and time.

Even if your postpartum period does not look the way you wanted or expected, it’s still important to treat it as the important time it is. Society often doesn’t acknowledge that women who experience a loss still need the postpartum period to heal, and that needs to change. It’s crucial to prioritize physical recovery, and in order to do so, know that it’s okay to take time off work, cancel any plans or obligations, and ask for help from others in your life to take care of you.

The specific steps you take to support physical healing and health after a loss may vary according to your unique situation and needs, especially how long you were pregnant and any complications you may have experienced. However, a strong foundation to support your body through this process includes high quality nutrition, hydration, and sleep/rest.

Nutrition & Hydration

Nutritionally, there are certain nutrients that are particularly important postpartum like iron, glycine, B vitamins, and DHA. Specific foods that can assist in your recovery and replenishment include slow-cooked meats (especially bone-in), organ meats, bone broths, quality fats like grass-fed butter/ghee and coconut oil, well-cooked starches like rice, plantains, and sweet potatoes as well as cooked vegetables as opposed to raw. Soups, stews, and chilis can be super nourishing in this period.

Hydrating by drinking sufficient water (a good goal is at least ½ your body weight in ounces daily) but also taking in electrolytes- minerals like sodium and potassium- is also important. Mineral-rich foods like sea salt and meat/bone broths and veggie stocks can be included to help. Limiting drinks that dehydrate the body- like alcohol and other caffeinated drinks- is helpful for maintaining hydration. However, limiting or even avoiding alcohol altogether is also beneficial as alcohol interrupts sleep, interferes with hormone balance, and provides no nutritional value.

Nutrition is important, but your needs will be unique to you, especially after experiencing a loss. Personalizing your food intake as well as any nutritional and herbal supplements may be beneficial, and this is best done under the care of a professional.

Sleep & Rest

Regardless of when you experience the loss, it can be both physically and emotionally taxing. You may feel exhausted, which is a sign from your body that you need to rest! Prioritizing sleep- a goal of 7+ hours each night- is important, but also resting whenever your body needs it. That may mean taking naps (especially if you’re having trouble sleeping at night) or even just laying in bed or on the couch.

Setting strong boundaries during this time- limiting visitors, outings, and obligations- may really help you to get the rest you need. And do your best to let go of any guilt. Sleeping and resting more doesn’t make you lazy. It’s a necessary aspect of recovery. Listen to your body and give yourself lots of grace.

Exercise After Loss

We understand that exercise is an outlet for stress-relief for many women, but when it comes to returning to exercise after loss, it’s vital to approach the process with care and intention. especially in terms of core and pelvic floor rehab and safely increasing intensity. You’ll need to first speak with your doctor about when you can start exercising again, and whenever you’re ready physically and mentlaly, our SP postpartum programs can help guide you in a safe and effective way.

We do want to mention that our Recovery Program as well as Mamas Suns Out Guns Out do include some language that can be triggering to those who’ve experienced a loss, so we encourage you to avoid these programs if you expect this to be problematic for you. However, the language in our Rehab program was intentionally designed to be inclusive and sensitive to women experiencing loss, so we feel this program is a good fit for these circumstances.

The Rehab program was created as a tool to help you reconnect to and strengthen the entire system of your core. It’s gentle enough to start as early as 4-6 weeks postpartum, including breathwork as well as simple, fundamental movements that gradually progress to more complex and demanding forms of training.

We are happy to give anyone navigating pregnancy or infant loss free access to the Rehab program. Simply email mamas@streetparking.com if you’re interested.

Ultimately, no matter what your recovery and healing journey looks like, we encourage you to give yourself grace throughout this process. It can be a messy journey and healing often isn’t linear. It may change who you are and you’ll never forget what you’ve gone through, but you can come out stronger than ever before.

Please know that while we have provided our best recommendations based on our expertise and empathize with and support you fully, we also are aware that we’re not the authority on these subjects. We’ve compiled a list of resources for obtaining more information and support about pregnancy and infant loss below. We also welcome you to join the Street Parking Women's Loss and Infertility Support Group. And as always, we recommend working with your doctor and/or a mental health professional through this journey, especially regarding any concerns or questions you have.

Information & Resources:

The Fletcher Foundation

Birthfit Infant Loss Plan

Ending a Wanted Pregnancy

Expectful’s Pregnancy Loss Support Guide

Help & Support Groups:

PSI Pregnancy & Infant Loss weekly online meetings

Baby Loss Doulas and Bereavement Doulas

Heaven’s Gain Ministries (free support)

Star Legacy Foundation support groups

Star Legacy Foundation Support Line: 952-715.7731; ext 1

Meditation Apps: